Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Every PT is not created equal

I dont know what is going on with my body- why it chose the week before my PT was to be flare beyond anything I could ever remember

Im laying in bed now as I type this- trying not to slouch..... but just sad I have to lay down at all.

the PT session killed me- she uses a different technique than my PT... and even different than last summer when I saw her... IMO it seemed like she was massaging the muscles and turning her hand to do it.   At times she would press too close to the vulva... and it killed me........  her external release is much different too and while it didnt seem like she was pressing all that much - my body feels like a train hit me....  I think the movements were just to fast...and my body reacted to it horribly.

some positives is she was able to explain the internal PT more...and I think I get it now more than ever before... which if this ever calms down could be a huge blessing and worth this pain I am in right now.

Im going to pray I recover I am soooo not used to feeling like this...back to last winter and how bad I was.

She did say I will have this the rest of my life and just have to manage it...........this SUCKS!!!!     Any normal activity could flare my obterator... sitting indian style... WTH!!!   driving,  

Im even in too much pain to cry and traumeel isnt touching this pain... 
what on earth is going on.     My period is due too soon... last month I had NO pain... I wasnt in bed with it...somehow I think I might be paying for all of that now.....  this is insane.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Self PT- Epic Fail

so I tried once again to do self PT... I thought a few weeks ago I finally got the hang of it because I did not flare that much after.   At the instruction of my PT from last week to do self PT atleast once before t his weeks session since my muscles were so bad..... I DID

and today I paid for it- my muscles are very very angry at me.........I obviously have NO friggin clue how to do self PT....  I cant even get my thumb into the position of nine oclock.....  

I thought the ridge I felt at seven was a trigger point, but who the hell knows@@

cant they just offer some sort of class for this type of thing..I mean it is chronic afterall....why not show us the position our hand should be in, so we know how to do it and dont  cause more pain.

Im starting to get very overwhelmed with everything in my life...........why cant anything ever go smoothly...

I may ask the PT this week if she would let me do self PT there so she can show me how to do it......... I mean at this point so many have looked at my crotch...I could friggin careless..........i just want to learn how to do this , instead of sitting here suffering yet another nite.

this setback is bad........... I was at such a good place too before this............

I have nerve damage in my back..not sure where exactly since the neuro didnt send the interpretation to my PCP....  and didnt explain it... I could have hormonal issues........

and for some reason I cannot stretch like most stretching makes me worse.   

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Huge Setback- I hate you obetrator internus

Really- why where we born with a muscle that can inflict so much agony-  WHY???

I was going along  holding my own as my PT says...for quite awhile... basically just the trigger points 'bands' at 7 and 5 o'clock at the ilia coxygeous... now that is a muscle I can deal with.

I have been majorly stressed and due to circumstances out of my control will probably be stressed for months to come (basically my home has severe storm damage, and my homeowners is fighting everything) 

back to the muscles-  I am in ovulation or was, so I just thought I was flaring from that, even though I had more bladder symptoms and bowel symptoms than normal.   I never thought the obterator would be flared... I thought that was a thing of the past, and because I didnt know to look out for it flaring... I am now stuck like this.

I cried some tonite-  I dont know how I could go from the spot I was in- just about ready to add back in some strengthening , and mild stretching and now WHAMO...back to this flaring

and anyone reading this that has this muscle SUCKS.........   this muscle is the one that causes me so much pain during me period (anyone know why that is???)

My PT worked on it and it raidiated pain all the way up to my opposite hip... I felt like I would pass out it was that intense.

Last month during my period I hardly had any pain at all... I htought I had reached a huge turning point and now I have this........... 

So, now with not being able, to sit , stand or walk without pain... I am so screwed as I have all this home crap I have to take care of and I just physically cant.

I guess everything happens for a reason-  I just cant figure this one out.  thru tears I write this post- hoping one day I can look back on it and say- yea I did make it thru that flare.........

Life really just sucks right now.   I could just crawl in a ball and stay that way for a very long time. 

anyone out there know why the obterator internus would flare?  Does anyone activity cause it to get so beyond tight??  

ALso last session it took a long time for my hip flexor to calm down and I do wonder if this could be a contributing factor.