Wednesday, September 22, 2010

i should be doing backflips right now

I had PT today, and despite all the pain during my period  the GI appt pelvis stayed aligned.... WTF

I know that the period issues were not PF related this month- it had a different feel to it......

but I havent a clue why I stayed PT thinks it is the strenghthening I have started to do......

BUT instead of being able to celebrate I lay here in pain from today session........ she released the hipflexors...and did some very very minor work internally and relased the piriformis on both sides.

I feel like I went in there today with everything out of alignment-  I mean shouldnt i feel good right now since I went in there aligned and with hardly any symptoms?   So , now it will be in recovery mode..........which mentally is freaking draining the crap out of me........... to endure this whn I was OK to begin with.

IF I had known i was OK, i would have skipped this week.

I guess the positive is I stayed aligned........ so that is huge progress not only that but my PFD has remained at a low tone for about three weeks now........ that is good.

I just wish i wasnt having this awful deep gnawing pain.......  why do I react so differently to PT than most. 

I just hope this will calm down and I will get back to where I was today when I went into PT........ but this means tomorrow I most likely wont be out running errands , but will be stuck at home.... trying not to push things.  ugh, frustrating to say the least. 

I am really trying so hard to remain positive.......... and hopeful even that maybe one day soon I will overcome this... somehow.  

Monday, September 20, 2010

another Dr left puzzled

GI appt-
goes somewhat like this-
resident first chats with me-   during convo asks why i cant work( I am growing to ohhh soo HATE this question)  I am though wondering if possibly there is some reason they have to ask if IC, PFD and Vestibilitis arent enough to make someone disabled!!

I tell her my symptoms and she asks what caused my which I reply I didnt think anyone knew what caused which she says for some cases they do :(   For five years of dealing with this all I have gotten in speculation...... so many different theories... 

the resident leaves and then they both come back into the room.

Dr is reall friendly and I thought nice...although she did try to make a joke of something I didnt really think was all that funny really. 

I told her my symptoms and she was puzzled....... especially when I described what was going on with my stools- and the white substance that now often wraps around them.

she at first thought it was part of my colon coming off in my stool (to which I swallowed hard) her explanation made me quite ill...she explained, while drawing a diagram, that often with PFD the muscles being so tight will actually cause ulcers in the colon and cause it to slough off into the stool....   
this bit of news frustrated me too- because all these years my pelvic/uro place has never once mentioned this could be happening to me- even when i had the bad bought of constipation........  and i have to ask myself why not ...dammit.

anyway, i decided at that time due to the personality of the Dr and she was about my age, that I would tell her I actually was so fed up with Doctors not knowing what was going on with me I took a pic of this substance in my stool- so she of course was thrilled and wanted to see it.   After she saw it she was more puzzled...and her previous theory went out the window...she said it did not look like pieces of my colon,. 

She went to examine me- but had me lay on my side...and my PF muscles were not cooperating at all so I barely got an exam- ......... very frustrating to say the least.  
the scary part is she found blood, microscopic blood.... so she wants a colonoscopy to be done after I get a bunch of other tests done first.   She said possibly could be some type of colitis.   She wants me to do a gluten challenge and eat gluten for a week and then get a blood test done to see if I react.   I doubt I body never tests positive for anything I need it to test positive for........why should it start now. 

there was also mention that I had a hemoroid.........which her colleague a few months ago diagnosed as a skin tag...i told her that today and she said she would have to disagree with that dr on that.   So what the f is it...a skin tag or a hemmoroid?  guess I will need to seek out a third opinion on that one

I feel very worn out from todays appointment and just kinda down tonite.  

Last week my period tried to kill me again- and something is seriously wrong on that front as well........but who will i Dr can figure this out....they take some guesses but that is about it.   I swear i have a UTI or yeast infection- but do I risk going back to the Dr that treated me so horribly because they are the only center that can test accurately.

I remain a medical mystery.  I wouldnt mind if there was atleast some sort of drug to help with these symptoms...ugh.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Much better day, but why

I guess I shouldnt ask why and should just be thankful for whatever reasons...I have recovered from the stress enduced flareup.  Today I woke up and could tell right away something was different.   then I went to PT and it was confirmed the PC muscle was much better and no longer real tight.... for whatever reason it calmed down....thankfully.  The IC muscle was still involved but overall tone was not so bad.   the external muscles and SI joint however are still giving me issues.   I now know that compressed feeling I get is a sure sign i need someone to 'pull my leg'    to get that joint to open up and the pelvis to be lowered.  ugh, so much maintenace.

I walked about a block on Monday.... did self PT on Tues...and then did some very mild stretching and strenghtening yesterday.   Somehow It seems I tolerated it OK.  

I really am determined to continue to stretch a muscle everyday, maybe twice a day...  and see if it makes any difference at all.......and work on the strenghtening as well.

One of these days something is going to have to work.

I still have some issues though with this burning at ovulation....  and just how deconditioned I am in general.

I see today as a positive- if even just for the day I am thankful. ..and it once again proves I can indeed get out of a horrific flare.

If only i knew why though... why the PC muscle just stopped flaring... heck I would keep doing what I am doing whatever it is that is keeping the tone down.  sigh.